All is fair in love and war. That's the old cliche, right? All is FAIR in love AND war. That doesn't make it hurt any less. I think that is a crappy saying. I also think people use it as an excuse to say "well, all is fair in love and war, so you should have seen it coming." Why? Why should that person have seen it coming? Fair does NOT equal approve. It just means more than likely, that poor sad person will pick up the pieces and move on. Which is fine, we all have our disappointments. But that doesn't mean they have to like what has happened. Or that they can't dislike the person who made them feel that way. And why does it only apply to couples? Is there only love between men and women (or men/men, women/women, I don't judge!)? What about parents and children? Or siblings? Does the saying apply to those situations? Why not? It's still love, correct? And anyone who has ever had a brother or sister knows it can also be war. Or anyone who has raised a teenager. Does that make everything that happens, "fair"? Because I'm pretty sure people would be pissed off at each other all the time if so.
     This brings up my next point. I've had my own fair share of situations that have hurt deeply. Because of that, I also have quite a few complexes about certain things. I always tell someone, words mean nothing to me. Actions are what speak. Why? Because obviously I've been hurt by someone saying one thing, and doing another. So I just ignore what people tell me. If they follow through with what they say, then good for them! I normally still don't care. It takes a lot of time and effort to build the trust where I will actually expect you to do what you say, and no time to tear it back down. Therefore, most people don't ever try. Some people however, I am more inclined to trust their words from the get go. I don't know why, I can't explain it, but all's fair in love and war, right? And then when I do get disappointed, I feel surprised. Ummmm, why? Why am I so surprised, that yet again, I am hurt by words? Why did I let my guard down? What does this person have that makes me trust them so much more than the rest? And yet, I allow it to happen over and over, and every time I am still disappointed. Fancy words, a gazillion, Emily, zero.
     I think that no matter how much we try, we don't change. We may change our habits, but our disposition never changes. Some people will always follow their gut instinct, others never will. People will say, I don't ever fall in love first, yet the chances of that happening at least once are pretty high. Or, I will never turn out anything like my parents, I will never make xyz mistake again, I will never touch another bottle, etc. But it still happens. I think we love to be let down. It is almost like it calms us, lets us get out all our emotions. Anyone who is happy all the time isn't really living, right? There have to be downfalls to make the happy times stand out. Question is, when is enough, enough? And what do you do if the highest joys and lowest failures are from the same source?

Leave a Reply.